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O, alcohol. May 5, 2013

I don’t have a drinking problem, though when you read this you will think that I do.

I like writing when the drunk opportunistic arises, though I feel bad that it’s the second time in a week. But anyways, I have a few friends over, one of them a male, the other a female. The female I have had a crush 0ne for the longest time. The male is different, obviously. I’m drunk, but checking my spelling quite closely, and the only friend staying over is the guy. No big, he’s like my brother, I love him to death.

Fuck, this is taking too long. I can’t seem to type without proper grammar and shit. Whatever. I will try to let it go. Don’t think I am. UGH. FINE. I am drunk with my best friend and mom. SO EFFING SUE ME. Don’t care. ANYWAYS. My best friend is a guy. I think if I wasn’t gay then I’d be with him. That’s a weird thing to say. He’s just a cool guy. ANYWAY FUCKING WAYS. I’m talking to this girl. She seems legit. Ish. I don’t know how old she is. But I’m ready to be done with all these games and shit.

I want someone. I wants someone who understands me and loves me. I wants someone who gets why I love my family and why I care so much.

I suppose doing this blog doesn’t help…Finn, what do you think? I know this is the second drunk post I’ve made. Why don’t I fly across the pond and live with you? Maybe life would be less complicated. Perhaps I will fly across the pond anyways. You’re my favorite on this blog. But I digress. I hope my friends undersrtand me. I hope they get my I am frustrated. I hope they understand why I can’t seem to share my feelings. Oh well. I give up. I don’t understad what love means right now. I hate feelign this way.

Anywho,, mom’s home from her walk, shoul probably get off here. Hope al is well! Love you all.





New direction and video blogging. April 15, 2013

Yesterday I watched an amazing movie called Fat, Sick, and Nearly Dead. It was about a guy who was exactly what the titles assumes…he was overweight, sick, and knew he was slowly killing himself with food. So, long story short, he juiced fruits and veggies for 60 days, lost nearly 100lbs, and but his illness into remissions. It changed his life forever.

Let me tell you – watching the movie changed my life forever, I can guarantee it.

Tonight, I plan on starting a 10 day juice fast. I will be juicing fresh fruits and veggies, and drinking water and tea throughout to stay hydrated. I researched juice fasting extensively yesterday, and I’m on board to give it a shot. I know that the first week will be incredibly hard. While the body is detoxing there will be many symptoms involved that probably won’t be pleasant. But still…to get healthier, I can get through it!

My first video blog post will be tonight – I feel like it will be easier to explain how I am doing through video rather than writing. I’m super shy and awkward, so it will take some getting used to, but I hope people will watch it. It will definitely help keep me accountable, which is going to be the hardest part of the juice fast.

I also wrote myself a letter to only open when I’m struggling or if my motivation has disappeared. It is a full page letter to remind myself of why I am doing this, and why I should continue. I will carry it on me every day so that I’m never without it.

That’s about it until later. I’ll see ya soon!


NOTE: In light of the bombings in Boston, please please PLEASE be safe and speak up against ANY suspicious activity, no matter what city you are in. Also, if you are able to, please donate to the Red Cross or any other organization that may help the families and those injured. It’s my understanding that many people have lost limbs. My thoughts are with everyone affected, and I will be standing by for more information. RIP to those who have lost their lives.




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